Wednesday, July 12, 2006

Party, party, party! (7/10/06)

I really hate the times when I can't sleep. You can probably tell this is one of those days since I am blogging at 4:56 in the morning. Once every couple of weeks, I just have a night where my eyes pop open about 2 or 3 in the morning and I cannot get back to sleep no matter how much I meditate or how many sheep I count. After tossing and turning this morning for two hours, I finally decided to get up and be productive.

Eli's birthday celebration on Saturday culminated with a big dinner at Cheeseburger in Paradise. I LOVE that place! They have the best hamburgers in the known universe. When I was listing off places for Eli to choose, I mumbled everything else and made a frowny face, but then I smiled really big and said, "Or we could go to Cheeseburger in Paradise!" Without missing a beat, he said, "I want to go there!" I think all mothers start to develop that manipulative streak after giving birth.

Yesterday was Heather's bridal shower. (That's me and the bride-to-be pictured above. See the photo album for more photos of the shower and Eli's birthday. For those of you looking at the Gramatix site, visit Anyway, I was afraid the rain would keep people away, but only one person ditched, so we had a great turn-out. I promised Heather that I would no longer refer to her as Bridezilla, and she promised me she wouldn't make me walk down the aisle to "Honky Tonk Woman." I consider that a win-win.

Whenever there is any sort of event, I usually just immediately accept the fact that I am going to put my foot in my mouth. Yesterday was no exception. You see, the groom, Jim, has an ex-girlfriend whom he was with for about 15 years, from my understanding. In addition to that, his mother is apparently best friends with his ex's mother, so that makes things a little sticky - especially when I get involved.

I was discussing the rehearsal dinner with Jim's mom when she said, "I don't know if I'm invited to the rehearsal." Heather informed her that yes, she would in fact be there. So (and God knows why), I opened my big mouth and said, "My only tip for you is not to sit there sobbing during the rehearsal like my mother-in-law did or everyone will think you're wishing Jim married his ex-girlfriend." Heather immediately shot me a look that said, "What the hell are you doing?" I had no idea. My mouth was on auto pilot, and my brain was screaming, "SHUT UP!" but there was nothing I could do.

At that point, I felt the urge to try to cover for such an idiotic comment on my part, so I started digging the hole even deeper. I said, "My husband and I often joke that the reason people on his side were crying was because they wanted him to marry his ex-girlfriend." (insert nervous laughter here and visualize Heather shaking her head.) "But I'm sure you won't . . . I think the rehearsal dinner will be fun!" Oh God!

Aside from that minor catastrophe, I think everything went fairly well. Although, yesterday is the first time I met Heather's brother and he has the same looks she does. By the end of the shower, I was getting annoyed that he kept looking at me like I was a crazy person. Yes, I realize that I am a crazy person, but it's polite for people to hide the fact that they know it also.

I think I sufficiently embarrassed Heather with a fun game of "How well do you know Heather and Jim?" She made me take out all the sex questions, so I'm saving those for the bachelorette party. We also made the guests dress Heather's mom and Jim's mom up as brides using toilet paper. For the third game, everyone received two clothespins when they walked in the door and if they uttered the groom's name, someone got to take one of their clothespins. That game got very confusing due to the fact that Heather's dad is also named Jim. How weird is that?! Could you imagine shouting your father's name out in the heat of passion? Double ewwwww!!

Next up on the party agenda is Eli's birthday party, which we will be celebrating on Saturday. I would have had it this weekend, but I thought two parties in one weekend was a little much, even for me. Saturday, we will be heading out to Deanna Rose Farmstead where we rented a corral (yes, a corral). Everyone can enjoy pop, cupcakes and party favors before heading off for the hayrack rides, pony rides, fishing and panning for gold. It should be fabulous!

Then, Amy and I will take on the task of planning a bachelorette party. The only thing we've decided on for certain is we will in NO WAY be having a stripper. When we hired a stripper for Stacey's bachelorette party six years ago, he had butt pimples. It was disgusting, so that was the end of that.

For Heather's bachelorette party, I'm thinking fun, yet not a bar with wall-to-wall drunk people. And I really have no idea where that might be. I am soooo out of the loop. I'm thinking a nice piano bar, but we're not opposed to some karaoke. Eric suggested pole dancing, but we're going to call that Plan B. If anyone has any suggestions, please shoot me an e-mail or leave a comment after my blog. Heather was thinking a show at Starlight would be nice. I'm all for upscale, but I was thinking a few rounds of shots and a condom veil. I think we might need to work out a compromise.

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