Wednesday, July 12, 2006

Library Escapades (7/11/06)

It's going to be one of those days - I can tell already. My blog was about half written when it suddenly just disappeared. I will now try to contain myself from taking an axe to my computer and rewrite my witty, sarcastic tale of our trip to the library.

That's right, yesterday was our weekly trip to the library, and you wouldn't think it could be such an adventure. But, every week I am surprised by the escapades that actually occur at the library. Usually, I just hold Georgia so I don't have to get out the stroller. After last week when she squirmed out of my arms and attempted to launch herself at the woman on the other side of the counter, I decided it would be a good idea to take a few extra minutes to get out the stroller.

So, here came the Forssbergs up to the library. Eli was steering the stroller, and I had my hands over his so he wouldn't drive his sister into oncoming traffic. When we got up to the door, a man was walking in right in front of us. He walked in the door and let it slam shut on us. Grrrrr!

That has got to be my biggest pet peeve ever, and I am surprised how much it happens. I often go out of my way to open the door for people who need help, and I can't imagine letting the door slam shut on a woman with a stroller and two kids! What possesses people to act like that? It desperately made me want to call this man's mother and chastise her for the way her son was raised. I did open my mouth to shout, "Hey, Jerk-off!" but I stopped only because I didn't want to have to explain to Eli what a jerk-off was. Yay for self-control! That's the hypnotherapy working for me.

After we maneuvered ourselves into the library, we dropped off our Dora DVD and went off in search of another DVD. They were out of Bob the Builder. (They're always out of Bob the Builder.) Much to my. . . errr, Eli's joy, they did have two Wiggles DVDs. I asked Eli which one he wanted, and he wanted both. So we brought home "Whoo Hoo! Wiggly Gremlins!" and "Yummy Yummy!" My thoughts exactly!

When we went up to check out, I was reminded how quiet the library actually is when my cell phone rang. Normally, this wouldn't be a big deal, but it was in the library because of two factors. First, Eric always complains that I never answer my phone, so I have turned the ring up as loud as it will go. Second, I have a specific ring for everyone in my phonebook. That really makes it easy because that way I know who is calling immediately. Plus, it amuses me a great deal. Stacey, who works for the government, has the "Mission: Impossible" theme as her ringtone. Eric's ringtone is the theme from "Love: American Style." Andrea's is "Everybody Dance Now." If you knew her in college, that would be self-explanatory. Heather wanted to choose her ring, so she has the theme from the "Muppets." And Amy's ring is the theme from "Facts of Life." I chose it because when Amy first got her phone, that is what she programmed in for her ring, and I thought it was funny.

Well, it was Amy that called while I was at the library. Again, this is my fault for being so creative with the ringtones. (Did I mention that Amy reads this blog? Not your fault in any way!) I'm standing in line when suddenly the library is filled with, "You take the good, you take the bad, you take 'em both and there you have the facts of life, the facts of life . . . " and it's coming from my purse. Now with some of the antics Eli has pulled in the past, I have become accustomed to people staring at me in public. I think it was the addition of the snickering that bothered me. So, I was trying desperately to locate my phone in my purse. You would think I could just follow the music, "There's a time you've got to go and show you're growing, now you know about the facts of life, the facts of life." Oh, crap!

Aha! There it is! And I hit silent. But the damage was already done. There was still snickering, along with Eli asking, "Who was that, mommy? Why didn't you answer it?"

We quickly checked out, and off we went. Once we got home, my only goal was to get the kids down for a nap. As I stated in yesterday's blog, I was up very early, and I was exhausted. I desperately needed a nap! Because of that, I should have known that the kids wouldn't nap. I think I got Georgia down for about 30 minutes before she woke up to poop. I thought I would just change her quickly and maybe I could get her to lie down with me in my bed and take a nap. I had popped in one of Eli's new Wiggles DVD's, so he was good to go.

I was changing Georgia on my bed, and wiped off her naked bottom. I reached to my left to get a new diaper, and when I turned back, she was lying in a growing puddle. Oh, double crap! "Georgia! It is not nice to pee on mommy's bed!" The elicited a huge grin from her. Girls are much more stealth about this kind of thing than boys are. When Eli was a baby, every time I changed him, I expected to get peed on. That thing is like a fire hose, and the second air hits it, it starts going! Girls on the other hand, don't pee every time you change them. They wait for you to get comfortable in that fact, and then when you least expect it, they let it rip. Then you don't even see it. All of a sudden, they're lying in this huge puddle and you don't even know where it came from! My only comfort is that at least when she pees, it doesn't hit me in the face like Eli did when he was a baby.

Needless to say, I didn't get a nap, since I had urine-soaked sheets and a very alert baby. I was supposed to go to a movie with Aaron last night, as he had secured me a free pass. I called to cancel because I just wanted to stay home and sleep. He was none too happy with me. But considering the mood I was in, he is lucky that I didn't go. I was passed out on the couch by 8:00, but still didn't get much rest because Georgia was sticking her fingers up my nose. When all of us finally did make it to bed, Georgia woke up at 2:30 this morning and wanted to come to bed with us, but not to sleep. She wanted to play. And it starts aaaalll over!

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