Saturday, February 03, 2007

So Abused

Tonight, I went to a Cookie Lee jewelry party. Have you all ever been to one of these? I always think it’s good to go to other in-home parties, so I can get ideas, yada, yada. Plus, I got cool jewelry. I don’t even wear jewelry, and I spent almost $40. I also think the consultant hated me, because I was there to pimp Passion Parties! I sat right next to the Cookie Lee gal, and whenever someone would check out and pay for their jewelry, I would hand them a card and tell them to let me know if they wanted to book a Passion Party. I’m working it!!

Anyway, the party was at the home of one of my neighbors – Dawn. Coincidentally, Dawn always seems to see me after I injure myself. I don’t think I’m excessively klutzy, but whenever I do seem to have an accident, it never fails that I will see Dawn. Once I bent over while in the bathroom and smacked my head on a towel rack – huge bruise on my forehead. That night, I saw Dawn at a barbecue. Before my last Passion Party, I somehow smacked my cheek on the coffee table. Big bruise. I saw Dawn.

The other day, Georgia pried the phone out of my hand and subsequently smacked me in the mouth with it. Fat lip for me. I saw Dawn that day. And today, just as my mouth was healing from the phone incident, I had another issue.

We got a new vacuum yesterday (more on that later), and Eli was hiding inside the box. I bent over to look in the box right as he popped up out of it. Oh, Jesus, Mary and Joseph, that hurt. You should see my lip. It looks like I’ve had an uneven collagen injection.

So tonight, I went over to Dawn’s with my newest fat lip. I’m telling my story of why I’m injured yet again, and at this point, it’s sounding lame, even to me. I told my husband that if the police show up at our door to arrest him, it’s not like I didn’t try to explain.

5 comments:

Desert Songbird said...

I wish I had a nickel for every bruise inflicted by the loving embraces of my son - I'd have a nice savings account by now.

I used to sell Partylite candles, and whenever I attended a Longaberger party or a Pampered Chef show, I'd always pimp my wares. It was especially fun when I knew there was Gold Canyon Candle rep there as well! Ah, the good old days. Home parties are just another good excuse for women to get together and do three things they love to do: shop, talk, and eat.

I'm going to a Partylite party tomorrow, and my friend Regina assures me there will be lots of slushy drinks with vodka in them for me!

Morgen said...

I love it how Dawn is like your Mrs. Kravitz to your Samantha.
Too bad you can't twitch your nose and de-flate your lip!
Hope the rest of your weekend goes better - and looking forward to reading about the new vacuum!

mo

Julie said...

Oooh new vacuum story! Is it weird that I'm excited about this?

Does Dawn not have children? You should ask her to babysit one day and maybe the tables will be turned!

crazymumma said...

Yay a new vaccum!

So funny about your fat lip. sorry. But it is. Hope you feel better. Cracking up. Bad collagen. snort.

Unconventional Beauty said...

Too funny!

I have one of those type things too. When ever I meet someone new they will usually see me in the same outfit the first 5 times they run into me. It doesn't matter if it's a week later or a month later somehow I always end up wearing the last outfit they saw me in.

I've never been to a home party, but they sound fun.

Unconventional Beauty