Hair Today, Gone Tomorrow

kids_hair
Originally uploaded by neila222.

I would bet that is actually the name of a salon somewhere. It’s a close runner up to Curl Up and Dye. I love that for a salon name. Has anyone seen The Blues Brothers? Anyway, I tried my hand today at cutting my children’s hair. I’ve tried it before, but after a couple of months, I seem to forget what a horrible experience it was, and pull out the scissors in the hopeful delusion that this time will be different.

I started with Georgia because she just needed her bangs trimmed – a fairly easy task. Easy enough that I’m not going to pay the exorbitant amount they charge at Sheer Madness for children’s haircuts. Last time I got a hold of Georgia’s hair with a pair of scissors, she looked like Moe from the Three Stooges. That is if Moe had been a one-year old blonde girl. But you get the point. She squirmed so much that I just kept snipping to try to get her bangs even. She ended up with bangs about a half inch from her hairline. It wasn’t pretty.

Three months later, they had grown out, and were getting in her eyes again. I can tell the child is going to have my hair. I can see the tumbly waves and wild stray curls already starting. This time, I sat her on the vanity and gave her all of my berets to throw in the sink. I thought that should keep her busy for a couple of minutes until I clipped those bangs. Unfortunately, she’s like me – we both get distracted by shiny objects. The second those scissors were in front of her face, it was chaos.

At 14 months, she doesn’t understand, “Sit still!” Or “Don’t move or I could poke your eye out!” I get nothing but frustrated screams from both of us. Finally, I got her bangs trimmed. They are jagged and uneven, but at least I learned my lesson from last time. They look better crooked and down on her forehead, rather than straight across and half an inch long. You can see my handiwork in the photo.

Then, it was on to Eli. With him, I don’t even attempt to use scissors. I get out the clippers and cut his hair as short as I possibly can. If I go about a half inch long, I’m good for another three months before I have to do it again. Luckily, he looks cute with short hair (I think). At least I don’t have to worry about it for another few years until he’s old enough to want a stylish cut – or worse, he’ll refuse to cut his hair at all.

I tried to make it a fun experience by making “mommy’s fun cape” out of a towel. That fell flat. I finally managed to get him situated in a chair. But as soon as he heard the buzz of the clippers, he rolled himself into a little ball. I had to cut his hair while he was rolled up as if it were a tornado drill – the whole time screaming, “It’s too sharp!” I tried to explain that the plastic guard of the clippers was the only thing touching him and it was not sharp. He didn’t buy that at all and squealed like I was trying to scalp him. From the look of his picture, you might think I did. Just remember, he has such light blonde hair, it’s hard to see it anyway.

But I finally got done, gave him candy, turned on Diego, and he forgot all about the traumatizing experience. So, I’m good for another three months!

Just as a side note that is completely off topic, I had my own traumatizing experience tonight as I watched the season premiere of Prison Break – it’s one of about five shows that I watch. Did anyone have a problem with the fact that they killed off Veronica?!!! My husband thinks I have a serious issue with reality versus fantasy because I talk about the characters as if they are real people. Yeah, whatever! Did I mention that they killed Veronica?!!!!