Tuesday, June 05, 2007

What's That Smell?

Today, Eric and I celebrated our 13th Wedding Anniversary. I was going to post a wedding picture, but since I hadn’t quite let go of my big 80’s hair (at all) by 1994, I decided against it. Our anniversary didn’t really go as planned, since we spent most of the day dealing with an emergency pee situation.

Yes, I said pee situation. For some reason, Eli thinks that just since he has a penis he can point the thing anywhere he wants and pee. Dude! WTF?! I am concerned this is only going to get worse with age. I dread the teenage years. Especially when beer and snow are involved.

This time around, it just involved anything that contains an open space. A receptacle, if you will. A drawer, for example, in my son’s mind is a perfect container for pee. He had this decorative little drawer in his room that wasn’t attached to anything – it was just a decorative little cubby that he had had since he was a baby. Yesterday, after it had sat innocently in his room for nearly five years, he decided to pee in it. Apparently it was so much more difficult to walk down the hall to the bathroom than it was to get the little cubby down from his dresser and pee in that instead. Again, WTF?!

Eli was very upset that we had to throw away his little cubby. We had a long talk about the proper place to urinate, and I thought that had solved the matter.

No such luck.

I ran some errands this afternoon, and came home to Eric saying, “Come here and tell me if you think Eli’s room smells like pee.” Oh crap. Well, yes it most certainly did smell strongly of pee. I looked around to see which receptacle-based toy looked suspicious. Aha! Georgia’s Little Tikes shopping cart. Dude! Are you freaking kidding me?! We looked inside, and sure enough. It was wet. We sniffed. Eeewww! Damn!!!

We are really going to see if we can get it clean because she loves that thing, and I really don’t want to have to go out and buy a new one. But even worse is that, as you can imagine, these toys are not meant to hold any type of liquid. The pee that was in the cart had leaked out all over Eli’s rug. Luckily, he has hardwood floors in his room, so we just have a big area rug down. When Eric picked it up, it was dripping . . . with pee.

Talk about counting to ten. I think Eric had to count to 100 before he went to get Eli. He had Eli help him throw the rug away, which really upset him, and another long talk ensued about the proper place to pee. Apparently, he is just discovering how easy it is to whip that thing out and aim it wherever he pleases. Not cool, people!!

So I'm really hoping this second long talk about the proper place to urinate will sink in. But just in case, I think I’m going to go hide all my shoes.


Sunrunner said...

Oh my. I am so sorry!!!

At least he doesn't forget to flush... Hang in there!

Donna said...

When my son was 10 or 12, he decided it was too much trouble to walk downstairs to the bathroom and started peeing out his bedroom window (through the screen!). Talk about stink!

Santi Marie said...

Man! You have discovered a future " Who'll-Pee-The-Farthest-Contest champion right there! :-). Bet, he has no courage to tell you yet that he is practicing! :-)

Sorry for the smell. :-)


Sadie said...

I had a college boyfriend who would get drunk and pee in inappropriate places. But that's another story for another day.

Morgen said...

Wow, don't even know what to say to this one....
except Happy Freakin' Anniversary!

You never thought in a million-gazillion years that you'd be posting about pee on your anniversary!

But I had to laugh when you said you were hiding your shoes!

tegdirb92 said...

oh my goodness--same problem in our house!! I feel so bad for you because I'm going through the same thing. We keep a little potty in my son's room in hopes that he uses it instead of an open block or whatever he finds :) Yes, we've replaced the rug once in his room too :)

Travis said...


Wait...you didn't rub his nose in that pee soaked rug???

Happy Anniversary!

Crazy Working Mom said...

I'm LMAO about you hiding your shoes...then I suddenly stop laughing and start banging my head on my laptop when I realize that I too have a small boy who will probably hunt down my shoes and pee in them just because HE CAN! *LOL*

Desert Songbird said...

First, Happy Anniversary. I know it wasn't too happy, but congratulations nonetheless.

Secondly, I have no response to the urinating situation. I'm baffled by your children's fascination with urine and feces; I never had to deal with this, so I have no advice and loads of sympathy for you. I hope Eli learns his lesson. If not soon, then I wish for nose plugs and lots of Lysol Wipes for you.