Manic Monday - Lie

This week’s Manic Monday word is Lie. There were several ways I could go on this one. Sandee at Comedy Plus tagged me for 10 Lies My Mother Told Me. I’m not quite sure if I will be able to do that one because my mother reads my blog, and errr . . . well, you can see my issue.

Then I started thinking of lies I have told my own children, many of which I got from my mother. Hmmm . . . Are some lies okay to tell your children? You tell me.

1. Brown sugar will give you worms. When I was little, I used to eat plain brown sugar. I loved it. So my mom told me that it would give me worms. I’m not sure I completely understood what that meant at the time, but it worked. I found myself spouting the same lie to Eli the other day when he was spooning brown sugar into his mouth.

2. The gypsies will come and get you. Okay, I’m going to hell for this one. I have a friend who said that when she was being really bad as a child, her mother would tell her that gypsies come and take away bad girls and boys. I thought that sounded horrible. Then came the day Eli pushed me over the edge, and I found myself spewing, “You better shape up or the gypsies will come and get you!” He’s still afraid of gypsies.

3. Coffee will turn your knees black. – This is another gem that I got from my mom (or was it my dad?). Anyway, Eli always tries to drink my coffee, so I told him this same thing. He gave me a bored stare and said, “Then how come your knees aren’t black?” I didn’t know how to answer that one.

Those are a couple off the top of my head. Now, Eli is picking up on the lying. Luckily, he is so bad at it that I know when he’s lying. I get things like “Mama! Georgia broke my DVD player.” I tell him that is not possible since Georgia has been napping for the last two hours. He says, “Well, she did it before she went to sleep.” Uh huh.

Poor little Georgia is the scapegoat for most everything these days. If I ask, “Eli, who ate all the fruit roll-ups?” Without hesitation, he responds, “Georgia did!” even though it is impossible for her to reach the child lock on the pantry.

Lately, however, Eli has expanded the blame. “Mama! All of daddy’s quarters are missing from the dresser, but I didn’t take them.” I said, “Really? Then where did they go?” He says with astonishment, “They vanished!” I asked him what really happened to the quarters (keep in mind the pockets of his jeans were jangling through this entire conversation). Then he says, “Well, daddy took all of his quarters to work.”

When I said we would call daddy and check, Eli looked alarmed. “NO!” Then I asked if he was going to tell me the truth about what happened with the quarters. He sheepishly said, “Okaaaaay.” So, I waited.

He looked at me and without missing a beat, he said, “Georgia took them!”