Wordless Wednesday - 1980-ish

This says sooooo much about my sanity.

The Macaroni Grill

I have a couple of lingering birthday stories to share this week, so today I will tell you about The Macaroni Grill.



Since two of my last five birthdays have been spent pregnant, I think I was trying to make up for it this year. I went out one night last week to celebrate with Amy and Heather, and we decided on The Macaroni Grill. Love that place!! Anyway, Heather and I were planning to split a bottle of wine. Since Amy has a baby due March 13, she was not partaking in our little drink-fest.

Well, at Macaroni Grill, if you order their house wine, they bring the whole (liter-sized) bottle to the table, and you pay by the glass. You just mark down each time you have a glass, and they total it up at the end. So we ordered a big-ass bottle of chianti, and we were ready to get started.

At first we did pretty well, and only had a couple of glasses. Then, they brought us a free dessert for my birthday and sang Happy Birthday in operatic Italian. That called for one more half glass of wine. Woo hoo. After that, we were ready to pay the bill. Right then, Heather’s husband, Jim (from here on out to be known as BL), showed up. I’m sure you remember her husband from my blogs about “The Wedding.”

Anyway, we realized we were more tipsy than we thought when we started commenting on Amy’s track record with birthday presents. The woman at the table next to me was telling me how cool my gifts were. And I said, “Yes, they did really well this year.” BL said, “As opposed to?”

And I said, “Oh please don’t make me refer to the birthday we shall just call ‘the quesadilla maker incident.’” BL’s response? “A quesadilla maker? Isn’t that a spatula?”

Exactly.

That pretty much did it for Amy, and she was out the door, flipping us off the whole way . . . with love. At that point, BL decided to have his dinner. Well, we couldn’t just sit there and watch him eat, right? So, Heather and I kept drinking the wine.

I think I knew I was basically screwed when I was attempting to shove the cork back in the bottle and it flew across the room, attracting the attention of near-by tables. This also drew comments from people wishing me a happy birthday, since they had heard the singing and seen me opening the fun gifts.

I flagged down the waitress to tell her we owed her money for more wine, and she just smiled and said, “Happy Birthday.” Dude! Free wine! Free chocolate cake! Macaroni Grill kicks ass!

Of course they were probably glad to see me leave. In addition to pelting people with wine corks, I have a loud laugh that tends to carry. At least I admit it. I know I’m loud. It also didn’t help that I was passing out my business cards for Passion Parties on the way out the door.

Manic Monday – Yellow

I will warn you now, this is an uncharacteristic serious post for me. But I figured I can throw in a serious post once every few months to keep everyone on their toes, right?

Yellow journalism - a pejorative reference to journalism that features scandal-mongering, sensationalism, or other unethical or unprofessional practices by news media organizations or individual journalists.

I don’t know if everyone knows this about me, but I not only consider myself a writer because I have an incredibly entertaining blog. I also have a degree in journalism, and once upon a time I did a lot of technical and documentation writing before taking on the career of a stay-at-home mom.

Therefore, I have a soft spot for communication issues and media law in general, as well as the lengths to which “journalists” will go to get a story.

One of the most blatant instances of yellow journalism that has always stuck with me happened by USA Today in 1992.

In addition to being a journalist, I am also a huge fan of tennis. Arthur Ashe was one of America’s great heroes, proving not only to be an amazing tennis player, but also to be a practical and productive activist. He was a great man.

Mr. Ashe officially retired from tennis in 1980 after suffering a heart attack and undergoing a quadruple bypass. In 1983, he needed an additional bypass, after which he received a blood transfusion. Five years later, he discovered he had acquired the AIDS virus, almost definitely as a result of the blood transfusion, which had occurred two years before mandatory testing for the HIV virus was required in donated blood.

Believing a public announcement would infringe on his family's right to privacy, particularly that of his young daughter; Camera, he revealed his illness only to his closest friends. But in April 1992, Mr. Ashe discovered that USA Today was preparing to follow up rumors that he was HIV-positive. The newspaper's editors told Mr. Ashe that if he would not confirm the rumors, they would attempt to find someone who would.

"Match point had come, and I had lost it," Mr. Ashe explained. "All I could do now was try to control the announcement itself, to have it heard directly from me."

Mr. Ashe made a public announcement and told the world he was stricken with full-blown AIDS. The fact that he had been forced into going public with his private turmoil made people think about the rights of the press and the rights to privacy.

Mr. Ashe was angry that "this newspaper; any newspaper or any part of the media, could think it had a right to tell the world I had AIDS." Yet he seized this as a motivational tool for educating the public and combating AIDS. He created the Arthur Ashe Foundation for the Defeat of AIDS, received the first Annual AIDS Leadership Award from the Harvard AIDS Institute, and addressed the United Nations on World AIDS Day.

It was Mr. Ashe’s inability to fight off pneumonia that finally took his life on February 6, 1993, leaving his wife and 6-year-old daughter.

More than 5,000 people filed by his casket in the Virginia Governor's Mansion, mourning the loss of a child from the segregated South who had become a gift to the world, a victim of years of illness who had fought to erase decades of injustice, a man who, says Roy S. Johnson, "had the frailest of bodies but moved mountains."

With my background in journalism, I am quite familiar with the importance of getting a scoop. But, I can also tell the difference between news and sensational yellow journalism, which is employed for no other reason than to sell newspapers.

I would like to think we live in a society where ethical journalism and the importance of people mean more than making money.

I have not picked up a USA Today since April 1992. And I don’t ever plan to again.

Computer Update

My new laptop computer finally arrived yesterday around 2:00 p.m. The company called yesterday morning and said it would be delivered that day. They couldn’t give us a time, nor could they tell us what the heck happened to our computer the day before, so that remains a mystery.

I was expecting our computer to show up with a passport stamped with a few different countries by the time it ultimately arrived.

After it finally got here, I was extremely excited until I was harshly reminded of how technology illiterate I can be. I was ready to get on the Internet, but I lacked a wireless router.

Off we went to Office Depot in search of a router. I walked in and started asking questions, and they told me they would go get their computer expert, Phil.

A skinny kid with big glasses and peach fuzz walked over to me, anxious to help. This is where I need that filter on my mouth. I said, “YOU are the EXPERT?! What are you? 16?” The poor kid said, “No ma’am. I’m 19.”

19, my ass! He didn’t even look like he had hit puberty yet. Luckily, he was helpful, and I got my router. Once I got home, it seemed to take me forever to install it, even though Phil assured me it was easy and that if I just followed the Wizard, I would be “golden.”

I did finally manage to install it, but I can’t seem to get to all of my regular Web sites. I’m guessing there’s a security issue somewhere that I can’t figure out how to address. And I am completely at a loss as to how in the bloody hell to set up a network with my desktop computer.

I really consider myself a fairly intelligent individual, but this whole thing escapes me. I am about 24 hours away from breaking down and calling Tech Guys to come out and do it for me. Or better yet, maybe I should go back to Office Depot and see if Phil makes house calls.

Photo Hunters - Soft

I decided to participate in Saturday Photo Scavenger Hunt this week. Mainly because the word is soft, and I have lots of pictures like this:

My big soft kitties, Marcel and Coconut are enjoying a quiet moment in which there aren't two children climbing on them, combing them or coloring them with markers. Relaxation for the poor kitties is very rare in our house.

The Glitch

I wish I could tell you that I am writing this blog from my brand spanking new laptop computer. Unfortunately, I can’t! After an awesome birthday, there had to be a glitch. My birthday computer, which Eric ordered online, was supposed to be delivered on my birthday before 5:00 p.m., and my loving husband had been tracking it.

At 11:00 a.m., he checked the tracking and it said, “Delivered,” but it was not here. I didn’t think anything of it. I said, “Oh, they probably mark it delivered right before they bring it. I’m sure it will be here.” And we went about our day.

By 4:00, still no computer. Eric was extremely irate, and I was getting annoyed. Eric called, and the company told him that it had been delivered, and not only that, but someone had signed for it. My response? “Oh, crap.”

I immediately started trying to think of which one of our neighbors signed for my computer and then decided to keep it. Stalker Betty from across the street? The crazy alcoholic next door? I’ve got my eye on them!

The company said the person who signed for it signed, “KKK.” Other than being a little cryptic, I don’t know what the heck that means.

So, after Eric hemmed and hawed for a little while (without raising his voice), they said they would have someone from the “Resolutions” department call us back tomorrow. Unfortunately (or fortunately), Eric wouldn’t give me the phone. I immediately go into what my hypnotherapist calls “fight or flight mode” and I am ready to kick someone's sorry ass until they give me a resolution NOW.

I have since calmed down. Wine and ice cream cake helped. But, dude! Seriously! I want my computer! And someone else is sitting down with it right now looking up porn. Not. cool.

Thank you!!

I want to thank you all once again for making my birthday so special!! My blog buddies are great, and I get all excited over unexpected gifts!

In addition to a very special Thursday Thirteen, just look at what Morgen gave me:



This is now my new desktop wallpaper. And after this, I will refrain from posting Went photos on my blog . . . for a while anyway.

In other surprises, I went to Caribou Coffee today for my free coffee, and Aaron had my birthday present – a bottle of Chilean Cabernet Sauvignon! Oh yeah, baby! I vaguely remember getting smashed on enjoying that wine at his house in December when I did his Passion Party. Woo hoo! I immediately went to Whole Foods to invest in some of their dark chocolate truffles to enjoy with the wine. What a fun birthday treat!!

After that, I went to buy myself something fun at Crate & Barrel. I love that store!! It just opened here in KC last year, and it rocks! Anyway, I have desperately needed a corkscrew for awhile. Mine is worn out, and doesn’t screw into the cork evenly. Needless to say, I usually end up with the cork in pieces before I’m able to get it out. So, I bought a spanking new cork screw and a really fun wine stopper. Here’s the best part! They couldn’t find the price for the wine stopper, so the girl just shrugged and put it in my bag. Oh yeah! She didn’t even charge me for it! Happy Birthday to me from Crate & Barrel!

13 Things That Make Today a Happy Birthday!

Today is the day I turn 35! Following are a few things that are making this one hell of a celebration!

1. Free Caribou Coffee!! They emailed me a coupon, so I can’t wait to enjoy my caffeine high – for FREE!! I wonder if that includes extra espresso shots?

2. No snow! After a barrage of snow this winter – including another bout of the evil white Winter’s spawn last weekend – it was 60 degrees today. It all melted! No snow on my birthday! The angels are singing!

3. Dairy Queen ice cream cake – Best freaking ice cream cake ever! The gooey chocolate, the crunchy chocolate middle. Oh yeah, baby! This is my birthday cake every year!

4. All new Grey’s Anatomy! They’re not really going to kill Meredith off are they? ARE THEY?!!!

5. Unexpected presents – A Starbucks gift card from Andrea, complete with coffee mugs; a coffee clock from Heather, plus an iTunes gift card! I freaking love presents! And my friends rock!

6. Eli, my 4-year-old, has promised to give me the biggest, Biggest, BIGGEST kiss EVER!! I can’t wait!

7. Eric is going to give me a massage . . . with the Smitten! Woo hoo!!

8. Eric has promised to cut his hair short and let me call him Went the whole day. I think he’s kidding, but isn’t he sweet to indulge my unhealthy obsession?

9. I left my birthday celebration with my friends the other night with a purple chianti mustache. Now that’s the sign of a good party!

10. Chocolate nachos! Cheeseburger in Paradise, here I come!

11. Laptop computer – My sweet, sweet husband bought me a laptop computer!! Can we afford it? No! Did he have to put it on credit card(s)? Yes! Do I care? Hell no! I’m getting a f*cking computer!!

12. I took the children in for haircuts, and they were actually well-behaved! Now that is not only a nice gift, it’s a miracle! It could have had something to do with the fact that their respective stylists were holding them in place, but still!

13. My blog friends! This last year, I have made some amazing friends, which I never expected when starting a blog. Here are some of their wonderful birthday presents: Look at what Morgen gave me! And Sadie! And Desert Songbird! And Sanni’s tribute brought tears to my eyes!

I love all of you!!! Thank you for helping make this the best birthday ever!!

Get the Thursday Thirteen code here!


The purpose of the meme is to get to know everyone who participates a little bit better every Thursday. Visiting fellow Thirteeners is encouraged! If you participate, leave the link to your Thirteen in others comments. It’s easy, and fun! Be sure to update your Thirteen with links that are left for you, as well! I will link to everyone who participates and leaves a link to their 13 things. Trackbacks, pings, comment links accepted!

View More Thursday Thirteen Participants

Wordless Wentworth Wednesday!

Since my birthday is tomorrow, I decided to wish myself a Happy Birthday with Wordless Went'sday!! I hope all the ladies and gay men out there enjoy this as much as I do!!

The Extravaganza Continues

My goodness, I think I have a hangover from Morgepalooza! I hope everyone had a chance to check out the party going on at It’s A Blog Eat Blog World! Morgen rocked the house for his 40th birthday. 40 posts!! And I have trouble some days coming up with anything to say! I hope your birthday was a great one, Mo!!

Where Morgen has Morgepalooza, we have Neila’s Birthday Extravaganza. This really started a few years ago when Eli was learning to talk. It’s really fun to listen to a 2-year-old say “extravaganza.”

Eric always takes my actual birthday off work to celebrate, and if it’s near a weekend (like this year, it’s on Thursday), he takes Friday off too, so it’s a four-day celebration. Combine that with a three-day weekend the weekend before for Presidents’ Day, and it’s quite a celebration. This year, it’s seriously turning into a week-long event. By the time I’m 40, I’m hoping to reserve the entire month of February for the Extravaganza, but we’re still working on that.

Saturday night, I had a Passion Party that kicked ass! It was so much fun! I sold eight vibrators, and there were only six ladies in attendance. They are going to get down with their bad selves! I feel so proud! I was just happy that all of the women seemed to know what a clitoris was and where it was. I had a party last month in which that was not the case. Dude! A woman who doesn’t know where her clitoris is?! Not. Cool. Because you know that meant her husband doesn’t know either. And this woman has four children. Angels are crying somewhere over her lack of orgasms.

Anyway, after my Passion Party, I went to my friend Rebecca’s party. Her birthday was last week, so she was having quite a celebration at her house. I was quite giddy by the time I got home. Then, on Sunday, Eric’s parents watched the kids so we could go out to eat.

It sounds like such a small event, but I can’t tell you how nice it is to go out to an adult restaurant and be able to eat without a child screaming or climbing on me. I almost didn’t want to leave. When we did finally leave, Eric and I took advantage of our rare alone time, and made out in the car like a couple of 16-year-olds. What is it about making out in a car that just gets the juices flowing? I think it awakens some teenage hormones or something. The good thing is that we can now go home to bed, which is much more comfortable than hopping in the back seat.

My goodness, there’s some TMI and then some for you all!

Tomorrow, the extravaganza continues as I’m going out to dinner with Amy and Heather. I’m dragging them to Macaroni Grill for bread, wine and pasta. Yum-O! Then on Wednesday night, I’m celebrating with Stacey and Andrea. I don’t know where we’re going yet, but I am going to have to go on a serious diet by the time this week is over. Until then, I’m going to enjoy the hell out of it!!!

Manic Monday Celebration – Happy Birthday, Morgen!!

Today’s Manic Monday word, appropriately, is CELEBRATE!! That is perfect since it coincides with Morgepalooza (aka Morgen at It’s A Blog Eat Blog World’s 40th Birthday!).

That’s right everyone! Our dear friend Morgen is turning the big 4-0 today. So please join me in wishing him a Happy Happy Birthday! Better yet, make sure you head over to It’s A Blog Eat Blog World and wish him a happy birthday in person!

Morgen, I hope you enjoy your cyber present from your favorite Blog Mommy!

Happy Birthday!!

We here at Blog That Mommy! are also looking toward the birthday horizon, since I am celebrating the big 3-5 on Thursday!

35!! Jeez! How did that happen? It seems like I just graduated from high school yesterday, and then I woke up today and I’m a soccer mom with an SUV and two kids. WTF?!! Oh well, I’m loving every minute of it, so I can’t complain. But that doesn’t mean I plan to celebrate my 35th birthday completely sober. Needless to say, I will be writing my Thursday Thirteen early this week.

So, anyway, double birthdays, double the fun! This is birthday extravaganza week in my realm of the blogosphere, and what better way to start that off than with a little Kool & the Gang! This is the first record I ever bought with my own meager allowance – that’s right, I said RECORD. I bought the 45 single of . . . you got it! Celebration! Enjoy, everyone!!!!

Ouch!

Welcome to my newest series. This one is entitled “Things that hurt like a Mo Fo when you step on them in the middle of the night.”

Are you ready?


Dude! I can’t begin to tell you the expletives that came out of my mouth. I think my foot is still bleeding.

The Preschool Party

Scroll down for Friday's Feast

What an exhausting week this has been! We spent our snow day on Tuesday baking a cake for Valentine’s Day. I really don’t know what got into me. I always think it will be fun making treats with the children. But it evolves into me trying to measure ingredients and stir while Eli is sticking his hands in everything to taste it and Georgia is screaming and climbing up my leg.

Amidst the chaos, we made a fudge strawberry torte, which I posted below. It is wonderful! I lifted it from Pillsbury’s Web site, but I thought it was a good excuse for me to participate in Friday's Feast, so there you go.

Wednesday, I decided to take Eli to preschool in case they had their Valentine’s Day party that day since school had been cancelled the previous day. Remember how I said, “What are they going to do? Send us home?” Yeah, well, they sent us home. That’ll teach me to have a smart-ass attitude about everything. Luckily, the party was rescheduled for Thursday when all the kids would be there. So we packed up Eli’s valentines (again) and headed off to school on Thursday.

I was all happy with myself since I had my little individual bags full of candy for each child. Unfortunately, Desert Songbird’s evil twin apparently has a daughter in my son’s class. When Eli brought home his big sack of Valentines, I started rifling through it to evaluate the achievements and creativity of the other moms admire the cute Valentines from the other children. I was patting myself on the back as I pulled out Valentine after Valentine with one piece of candy taped to a little store-bought Valentine.

Then, I pulled out “the one.” There was one Valentine that consisted of a big bag of candy with a big handmade (!!!) card attached to it with a cute little ribbon. The card had a heart-shaped picture of the little girl on the front. You opened it up, and there were tons of Valentines stickers, and then on the back it said, “Lovingly handmade by (girl’s name)” WTF?!!! And I thought I was an over-achiever. Oh well, this gives me something to strive for for next year. Eric told me I need to calm down now or I’m going to be suffering from some serious ulcers by the time Eli is in first grade.

At least the mom’s coffee was rescheduled for today, too. Georgia and I went and hung out while drinking very weak coffee and I pimped my Passion Parties chatted with other moms. I did meet some other moms who seemed like lots of fun. One mom who I always thought looked kind of bitchy turned out to be freaking hysterical, so that was great! And two of the other moms lit up when they found out I did Passion Parties and started asking me questions about Gigi. Now they want to book a party! Yippy skippy!!

And to top it all off, I won the door prize drawing for free flowers. Why is it that when Eric got me a huge vase of roses and daisies on Valentine’s Day, I was warm and happy, but when I won a small vase of flowers at the preschool, I was ecstatic. My competitive nature? Hmmm. . . I’ll have to analyze that.

Friday's Feast (kind of)

It's Friday, and I'm posting a recipe. That's my definition of Friday's Feast - I'm such a rebel.

Anyway, I blatantly stole this recipe from Pillsbury. But, it is AWESOME!! I have made it a couple of times, and you can also use frozen strawberries if fresh strawberries are not readily available. This cake rocks!!

Fudge-Strawberry Cream Torte

Ingredients:

Brownie Layers
1 box (19.5 oz) Pillsbury® Brownie Classics Traditional fudge brownie mix
1/2 cup vegetable oil
1/4 cup water
3 eggs

Strawberry Cream
3 tablespoons granulated sugar
1 package (8 oz) cream cheese, softened
1 container (6 oz) Yoplait Thick & Creamy strawberry yogurt
1 1/2 cups finely chopped fresh strawberries

Chocolate Fudge
1/2 cup whipping cream
1 1/2 cups semisweet chocolate chips (9 oz)

Garnish
1 teaspoon powdered sugar
6 small to medium fresh whole strawberries, halved

Directions
1 . Heat oven to 350°F. Spray bottoms of 2 (9-inch) round cake pans with cooking spray.* Make brownie mix as directed on box for cake-like brownies using oil, water and eggs. Spread half of batter evenly in each pan. Bake 18 to 23 minutes. Cool on wire racks 10 minutes. Run knife around brownie layers to loosen. Place wire racks upside down over pans; turn racks and pans over. Remove pans. Cool completely, about 35 minutes.

2 . Meanwhile, in small bowl, beat granulated sugar and cream cheese with electric mixer on medium speed until well blended. Beat in strawberry yogurt until smooth and creamy. Fold in chopped strawberries. Refrigerate while brownie layers cool.

3 . In 1-quart saucepan, heat whipping cream over medium heat, stirring constantly, just until cream begins to boil. Remove from heat. Add chocolate chips; press into cream. Cover; let stand 3 minutes. Vigorously beat with wire whisk until smooth. Cool completely, about 30 minutes.

4 . To assemble torte, place 1 brownie layer on serving plate. Spread half of strawberry cream evenly over brownie to within 1 inch of edge. Carefully spoon and spread half of chocolate fudge almost to edge of strawberry cream. Repeat layers, ending with chocolate fudge. Arrange halved strawberries in spoke fashion on top of torte. Refrigerate at least 1 hour before serving.

5 . To serve,** sprinkle powdered sugar over top of torte and around plate. Carefully cut torte with hot knife into wedges to avoid “cracking” of chocolate fudge on top. Store loosely covered in refrigerator.

High Altitude (3500-6500 ft):Stir 1/2 cup flour into dry brownie mix. Increase water to 1/3 cup. Bake 21 to 25 minutes.

13 Things Said By My 4-year-old

Also known as 13 Eli-isms! Eli says so many funny things that I decided to start writing them down. These are a few gems he came up with over the past couple of weeks.

1. When I served him dinner – “Get that off the table! It’s slimy and smelly.”

2. When I hugged him – “MOMMY! You are popping my personal space bubble!”

3. When he saw the sign at the entrance to the library that said no weapons, he shouted, “Well it sure is a good thing we didn’t bring our gun!”

4. When we were at a standstill in bumper-to-bumper traffic – “Mommy? Are we stuck in the doldrums?”

5. After watching my husband shave – “I am not EVER going to have hair on my face like daddy!”

6. When eating lunch – “Mommy, look! When I chew up green beans, it makes green lettuce.” Then, he proceeded to spit it out and show me.

7. To his 19-month-old sister – “No, Georgia! You can NOT have mommy’s beer!” Always good advice. . .

8. In regards to his little sister – “Mommy, how old does Georgia have to be before she grows a penis?”

9. Whenever we pass a deer crossing sign – “Shhhh! You have to be very quiet. We’re going through a moose forest!”

10. To the librarian at preschool – “Actually, I don’t like books anymore. I prefer DVDs!”

11. On his way to the bathroom – “I need to go to the bathroom REALLY bad! My tummy is doing the cha-cha!”

12. When we went into a public restroom, he shouted, “Mommy, do you have a quarter? I REALLY need a tampon!”

13. When I held his hand going into the grocery store – “Mommy, let go! You’re going to rip my arm off!”

Get the Thursday Thirteen code here!


The purpose of the meme is to get to know everyone who participates a little bit better every Thursday. Visiting fellow Thirteeners is encouraged! If you participate, leave the link to your Thirteen in others comments. It’s easy, and fun! Be sure to update your Thirteen with links that are left for you, as well! I will link to everyone who participates and leaves a link to their 13 things. Trackbacks, pings, comment links accepted!

View More Thursday Thirteen Participants

Wordless Wednesday - Bath Time

The Superior Valentine

Tuesday was supposed to be Eli’s Valentine’s Party at preschool, and I was ready to do it up! Last year, when we got his Valentines for the preschool party, I wanted to get candy to put with them. Eric said, “No. The last thing the kids need is more candy. I’m sure everyone else will just be passing out regular Valentines.”

Well, apparently, things have changed since 1979. Back then (oh jeez – I’m old enough to say “back then”), you chose your Muppets valentines down at Gibson’s, signed your name and passed them out at school. So that is what we did with Eli.

They do it differently now. Valentines mean candy . . . and lots of it! When Eli brought home his little paper sack last year full of all of his Valentines, it was full of candy. Some had little Valentines taped to candy, and some didn’t even bother with Valentines and just wrote their names on the candy wrapper. Have you seen this? The Valentine candy now actually has "To:" and "From:" on the wrapper.

As you can imagine, I was mortally embarrassed as we were Eli was the only one who just passed out regular Valentines with no candy.

This year, I was not about to let that happen again. Not only was I NOT going to repeat last year’s Valentine’s debacle, but I felt the need to go above and beyond to make up for it. I bought cute little Valentine’s bags for each child, stuffed them full of candy bars and suckers, then taped the Valentines of Eli’s choosing (Backyardigans) to the sack. They were cute and full of sugar. Perfect.

We got them all ready on Monday night, and then went to bed. We woke up Tuesday morning to six inches of snow. School was cancelled. Are you f*cking kidding me?! It’s amazing that steam could still come out of my ears when it was only 2 degrees outside. I was not happy.

Eli goes to preschool on Tuesdays and Thursdays. Since we didn’t have school on Tuesday, the party would be rescheduled for Wednesday – when he’s NOT there! Yes, he can bring his Valentines on Thursday, but that’s not the point. I don’t want him to miss the party! I He worked hard on those damn Valentines.

Not only that, but the school was also having a mothers’ appreciation day on Tuesday. After we dropped the kids off, we were supposed to go to the community room and enjoy free cookies and coffee. I want my free cookies!!

So, I am planning to take Eli to school on Wednesday anyway, which is not his scheduled day. What are they going to do? Send us home? I would like to see them try. Eric thinks I am taking this a little too seriously. Me? Take something too seriously? Never!

Love, sweet love

Saturday was the big day. We brought home our new baby. . .

In all honesty, we paid more for the Dyson than we paid to the hospital when I gave birth to Eli. What’s wrong with that picture? Hmmm . . .

But, that’s okay. For $450, I am in lurve with my new purple Dyson. We went to Kohl’s on Saturday, and Eric made one last ditch attempt to try to talk me into some Eureka thing. But I only had eyes for my Purple D.

Then Eric tried to get me to choose a Dyson that was $100 cheaper, but if I was going to spend that much money, I wanted the one with all of the attachments. This one sucks up pet hair, cleans upholstery, and pretty much does everything except change diapers.

When Eric started trying to talk me into the yellow one, I picked up this baby (there was a handle on the box) and carried it to the register.

I played with it all afternoon on Saturday!

When I vacuumed for the first time, the dirt on the floor looked like it was literally chasing the Dyson. It’s as if the dirt was too good to be sucked up by anything less.

And here’s the coolest feature. The hose is like a slinky. It compacts right up into the handle, but it is so long when you stretch it out, that I can set the vacuum at the bottom of the stairs, and the hose will stretch clear to the top of the stairs! Isn’t that awesome?! I can clean my damn stairs without having to carry the vacuum up and down with me! This thing rocks!!

I am in complete and utter bliss.

Manic Monday – Spike

This week’s word for Manic Monday inspiration is Spike. At first I thought I would post an old picture of myself with short spiky hair. Then I looked at one of those pictures. *shiver* Scratch that idea.

So, this is the next thing that came to mind.

My all-time favorite TV show is Buffy the Vampire Slayer. Yes, I know a lot of you think it’s Prison Break. Incidentally, Wentworth Miller appeared in an episode of Buffy in Season 2, and a very brief snippet of Went can be seen in the opening credits of Buffy, Season 3, at 34 seconds in. (See below.)

But, I digress. No show will ever top Buffy. Buffy had the best writing of any TV show ever. The dialogue was amazing. Oh, I miss Buffy so much. Enjoy the theme song as I stroll down my Buffy memory lane. Incidentally, this is also the ring tone on my cell.

What does this have to do with the word “Spike” you might ask.

This. Is. Spike.

Also known as William the Bloody, Spike was so deliciously evil. Introduced in the first season, he was one bad-ass vampire, who had the legacy of having killed two Slayers. He was after Buffy, but one of the great things about Spike was his unhealthy obsession with Drusilla, a female vampire who was previously driven insane by Angel. Nothing more fun than a crazy vamp.

Anyway, Spike was a regular on Buffy up until the end, but he was best in the first two seasons, in my opinion. Then he was neutered in Season 3, and he was unable to hurt people. After that he lost that bad-ass quality, although he was still quite enjoyable. Although, I NEVER got the whole Spike/Buffy romance, but that is a whole ‘nother blog.

Spike did play a huge part in saving the world in the Buffy finale, and then he showed up on Angel. I’m still not quite sure how they were able to conjure Spike up after he was obliterated at the end of Buffy, but they did manage to do it, even though he didn’t have his corporeal form.

Jeez – this would take way too long to explain. My recommendation is to check out Buffy on DVD if you have not seen it already. You can enjoy James Marsters as the delightfully wicked Spike as well as all the other amazing villains, including Glory, Angelus, and my personal fave – the Mayor.

It’s a fabulous TV show! In the words of Buffy Summers, “We saved the world. I say we party!”

Car Tipping

I was amazed the other day to find out that two small children can come extremely close to tipping over an SUV. I had popped in the Wiggles CD, and Eli, Georgia and I were bopping along. Eli usually wants to listen to one of his CDs in the car, and the Wiggles and LazyTown are my favorites.

Anyway, when we came to a stoplight, my car was rocking like it was on hydraulics. The person in the lane next to me even glanced at me as if to say WTF? I just glanced back at him and smiled, as if to say “Sup? I know I’m cool.”

He probably couldn’t see my two children in the backseat who were rocking themselves so hard back and forth that I was momentarily terrified they would throw themselves from the vehicle. Thank God for safety restraints.

What song has this effect on my children, you may ask? Here you go: